Simone Kite and her husband Tom attend Tamborine Mountain Presbyterian Church and are preparing to plant Vine Church in Yarrabilba, Queensland. Simone is part of the Wives Network and reflects on her journey leading up to the launch in August 2025.

What’s it been like planting a church alongside your husband?

I honestly wasn’t sure what it looked like to be a ‘planter’s wife’, but I couldn’t shake the feeling that I wasn’t measuring up. 

I’ve been trusting God to lead us every step of the way, but living that out has a whole different experience. There was this invisible pressure to step into leadership roles I didn’t feel prepared for.

In the early days, my husband was still studying and I was caring for 3 kids who were 3 and under. On top of that, I’d volunteered to help with women’s ministry.

I felt like I was supposed to have it all figured out — but I didn’t. That loneliness was tough because I didn’t know who I should turn to amidst all of the complexities.

As the church plant got closer, I started to believe I had to carry the entire spiritual burden for all the women in the church, which only added to the weight!

How have you coped with the pressure so far?

What’s made the biggest difference has been finding a community of other church planter wives—women who truly understood the unique challenges I faced.

Through the Wives Network, we’d come together to share honest conversations about setting boundaries, managing expectations, handling conflict, and supporting our husbands.

Those conversations didn’t magically fix everything, but they were honest.

I wasn’t alone in my struggles or the exhaustion I felt—I didn’t have to explain or defend it. They already knew. 

I remember thinking, ‘Praise the Lord, someone gets it!’ 

How has working with a coach impacted your journey?

Having someone to process everything with has been incredibly reassuring. I was grappling with how to care for people carrying really difficult, even unsafe, pasts—even having come from jail.

Through our conversations, I learned how to extend Christ-like love—honouring each person as a forgiven and renewed child of God—while also maintaining healthy boundaries.

That shift didn’t just change how I set boundaries; it transformed the way I prayed. Instead of simply praying for situations to improve, I began praying that people would truly come to know and delight in Jesus.

What helped you to navigate the roles of wife, mum, and church planter with joy?

A conversation about identity with other church planter wives in the network deeply impacted me. We talked about how easy it is to tie your worth to being a pastor’s wife or a mum.

Knowing that my identity is in Christ is one thing, but hearing it unpacked and shared among women who truly understand that struggle was deeply freeing.

I realised I’m not expected to do everything. My role doesn’t have to be complex or overwhelming. Instead, I can rest in who I am in Christ and serve faithfully as a church member. 

Our true identity isn’t defined by roles or responsibilities—it’s found in Christ. I’m first and foremost a child of God. 

Tom and Simone Kite are preparing to plant Vine Church in Yarrabilba, Queensland on 31 August 2025. Please pray for their launch, and for the ongoing health of the church to draw more people to Christ.