Youth and young adults have unique challenges. Karl Bonner from Northlight Anglican Church shares with us how to help youth transition to a new stage in church.

What We Discuss

1. Changes from school to post-school: from programmed to self-initiated
2. Church provides constancy when there is a lot of change
3. Effects of COVID on people leaving school
4. Differences between adults and young adults
5. Young adults are less likely to conceal their sins, but are less likely to continue in good habits?
6. Appropriate levels of responsibilities
7. How to teach them in ways that leaves them wanting more

Tool Box

247 Youth Ministry

The Ecosystem and Youth Ministry

The Leadership Pipeline ebook

Credits

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Transcript

The following is an uncorrected transcript generated by a transcription service.

Today we’re going to be looking at, I think one of the key ones and that is the transition from youth to young adults.Today we got a great guest, Karl Bonner.Karl has a great guest.You are a great guest.Okay, all right, yeah, take that other guest.That’s right.Yeah.

One of the things I I love about Carl is he’s got some very unusual hobbies and.Very creative hobby yourself What No.No, what what’s what’s your hobby at the moment?What are you?What are?You working on I’m I’m doing kind of antique television repair has been my fixation.

OK, so I’ve taught myself, you know, circuitry and all sorts of things, but I’ve I’ve been buying up old CRTTVS.Are there any out there to buy?Yo, heaps, heaps.And they go cheap.Actually, people are giving them away.OK, if you can pick them up, they weigh about 80 kilos sometimes.So, but yeah, no, I’ve been, I’ve been picking up old CRTTVS, fixing them up and then intending to watch them, but then just getting another one and fixing it up.

Are you going to sell them or?I sold one to a friend who’s picking it up today, actually OK, but I’ve run a $200.00 loss on it because I’m a terrible businessman.So.But I think the upside is he’ll have it at his house.So when I go over, he’s got a cool TV.If you want to buy a CRTV, then come contact us.

We’ll put you in contact with Carl and you’ll be able to get one.But that’s not what we’re talking about today.Today you have pressed play on another episode of The One Thing Transitioning from youth to young adults.Today’s podcast is brought to you by Crossbeam Communication.

Reach and impact more people with help from Crossbeam Communications, your trusted Christian communications agency delivering powerful storytelling and marketing solutions rooted in faith.Visit crossbeam.com dot AU.And now back to the podcast.

All right, Karl, what I want to do is just go back and and look at if you, you’ve got somebody who is leaving school, they are going through a huge number of changes.What what are some of the changes that they’re experiencing?Well, I, I think the first thing I like you have that memory of being in school and like you have that tearful farewell at the end of your 12 and you say we’re going to stay friends forever.

You know, we’re going to keep up.We’re going to and when you hit what I was going to say 30, but probably more like 23.How many of your school friends have you actually kept up with?And the answer is for men, usually two or three, for women, five or six.And on average, you know, the, the people that you kind of thought you’d spend the rest of your life with end up being kind of people that formed you but aren’t your community and your friends.

You realise it was kind of like a is there a word for when people go to gaol and they have to be around people and they think that they’re best friends, but then you finish and you’re not forced to be together five days a week, so.I’m sure there’s a word for it, I don’t know what it is.Because gaol is not five days a week, isn’t it?I don’t know.You go for weekends, but your whole world gets upended socially.

Yeah.So there’s the complete turnover of your social space.Your world isn’t as organised, so, you know, nobody tells you where to be at what times.Even in university, everything’s on your own clock.There aren’t extracurriculars that are kind of developing and nurturing all of your skills and passions.

So your whole world goes from being programmed by other people to being kind of self initiated.And the space you enter into is one of huge autonomy.Church almost uniquely provides programming and community constancy when everything else in the world tips up.

And that’s that’s a real privilege, I think because, and I say this to youth group kids when they’re in year 12 that, you know, look around the room and you think that your best friends at high school be your friends the rest of your life.But much more likely, if you commit to this room of people, you’ll still be seeing them at growth group in the week, you know, leading youth together maybe or whatever you’re doing to serve Sunday night church together.

You’ll have more constancy with this community of people than your school friends.And that’s worth something.And that that’s a really interesting point.So just to say part of my research for this podcast, I did talk to one of my kids who’s just finished year 12.They had a lot of really helpful things to say.

And they were saying that some people have really coped with the, that transition really well.Others, you can see they’re just, they weren’t ready to leave school.They weren’t ready to the change of routine.And so there’ve been a lot of changes and, and not having that Christian community has meant they’ve, they’re really a bit of a loss.

Yeah, well, that’s the COVID affected generation.So, you know, like kids that expected to have this kind of, you know, triumphal entry into university life and they hear about the great culture of being at, you know, uni with all their friends, but had the experience of a COVID affected programme where their classes were online or the whole social space is, is altered.

I think that’s kind of jarring.And, and I reckon through Sydney specifically, churches have seen a, a downtake of young adults wanting to do night time things or wanting to, you know, hang out late or wanting to do more social things, all probably because of, because of the way COVID is affected.

Because of the, the, the, the way that their social world has been changed.So, you know, they weren’t just going to the parties that they used to go to and they weren’t going out.And so they they just haven’t got that routine.Yeah.Well, I mean, from me, from finishing year 12 through November until, you know, a year from there, it was like a whirlwind.

And people remember because he was my minister actually at the time, But that that whole time of life is so full and you’re spending all this time with people.And so if you had that experience in or just out of lockdown, the norms and the habits that kind of set and formed for I think probably about a five year band of young adults, is, is is really different.

Yeah.What?What do?You think just moving, I guess a little bit forward there, What do you reckon is the difference between, say, a young adult and an adult?In fact, I had somebody, I was talking to our small group about this last night and one of their kids referred to it as adult light as opposed to adults.

He goes I and he was at school.He said I’m just not ready for adult light yet, let alone adulting.What do you reckon is that is like?So I, I want us to kind of work out what does it mean to be a young adult?But what is it?What’s the difference between a young adult and an adult I?Think if I start very wide, Yeah, and I noticed this.I’m in the pivot point because I’m 32.

So I’m a I’m a young parent in my way of thinking about church demos.And you unfortunately, are an old parent.I am, but I think the the pivot point that’s the the most important is when you shift from looking forward to looking back.And already I feel kind of nostalgic, You know, I’m rebuilding CRT television.

So I’m looking at my childhood and trying to rebuild it for my kids.But young adults are almost entirely looking forward and they’re at the early end of that.I mean, that doesn’t, you know, that keeps going.I am still to some extent like I’m thinking about what’s next.But when you’re 18/19/2021, you’re thinking so broad about what your possibilities are, what kind of person you want to be, what kind of life you want to live.

You’ve got really strong opinions about, oh, I would never be that or I don’t want to, you know, end up there.And then when you kind of have made your decisions and you’ve got the bed, you need to lie and you kind of think, well, I didn’t think I’d be here.But that’s that aspirational nature of young adulthood comes with a kind of turbulence, I think, in sense of self and a non rigidity.